SALY...PART 205. WHY DOES MY WIFE CLAIM SHE CAN'T COOK ?

"A SNACK FOR YOU MY DEAR !" SHE SAID SLYLY !

I don't have time to cook and so rely on my wife To feed me at regular intervals which she does marvelously well despite telling me over and over again how much she HATES cooking !

She also apparently hates Hoovering, housework, shopping, flying and sex !

Anyway, this morning at 8:45 my workshop door creaked open and she handed me in...she will not cross the demarcation line between HER space and mine...two sliced juicily ripe nectarines, followed shortly afterwards by a plateful of nigh on totally incinerated hot roasted almonds with pieces of Asda's cheapest 30p a bar milk chocolate melting droolingly all over them !

I WONDER WHY SHE DIDN'T TELL ME THAT THEY CONTAINED CYANIDE !

And HOW delicious were they ?

YUM SCRUNCH that's how !

And she STILL says she can't cook !

She was then rather worried about the effects of eating burnt food and Googled burnt almonds and only told me later that they contain CYANIDE !

Goodbye everyone...Shirley knows where my Will is...in her bag !