It's only two years since her last fall and that one was caused by her trying to ride over soaking wet, slippery as ice railway tracks set into the cobbles at the harbour over a hundred years ago !
I wasn't there as I'd had to get back for some reason that now totally escapes me but when she got home, battered and bruised she said it was so instant that she hadn't even been able to put out a hand and went straight down onto one side leading to months of pain and even a visit to the doctors after about six weeks !
Fortunately her injuries did not prevent her from cooking my dinners otherwise I'd have starved to death by now !
Apparently two men stood nearby saw the whole thing and DIDN'T even help her up or ask her if she was alright which was SO kind of them !
So last night as we idled home from the beach along a sixfoot wide tarmac path with me in my customary Prince Philip position just behind her and unable to understand a word she was muttering between her clamped jaws....and I don't need to be behind her on a bike not to understand what she mutters to me between her clamped jaws....I was suddenly aware that her front wheel had fallen off the path and leapt down a quarter of an inch cliff onto the grass and as if in slow motion this was followed by the slowest crash you have ever seen as first one leg went out to rebalance her and then the other, with the bike twisting beneath her throwing her off to the left, that is back onto the path where she landed on her hands, one knee and then sort of gently onto her right cheek as gravity and momentum took over !
I leapt off my steed and was at her side before all her body parts had stopped rebounding against one another, reminding me of a wave breaking against a sea wall !
I got her up and sat her back on her saddle after checking that there were no bones sticking out of anywhere and off we went with her saying, "I must have stopped concentrating for a second there when I was telling you something and anyway it's not stiff enough !"
"What isn't ?"
""My handlebars or the wheel or something ! My old bike that was stolen from outside the Co-op on the day of 9/11 was much stiffer !"
"I'll have a look tomorrow !"
"Don't bother ! I'm never riding a bike again !"
"But what if we go out and buy you a new one tomorrow when all the non-essential shops reopen after the lockdown !"
"No we won't because I'm never going into a shop again !"
"Why not ?"
"Because I NEVER go shopping because I always send you with your little lists and your trolley and haven't been in one for twenty years and I'm not starting again now just to catch the virus !"
"The virus has gone !"
"Oh, you're an expert now are you ?"
"No but I just know...you'll see !"
"You're an idiot !"
"There is that !" I said, wondering how bonkers she would go if I turned up with a new bike for her...and a helmet !
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