I AM GOING TO TRY TO BE LESS IRRITATING TO SHIRLEY FROM NOW ON THOUGH IT'S A BIT LATE FOR THAT AND I AM GOING TO TRY NOT TO HATE THE FOLLOWING THIS YEAR OR LET THEM TURN MY STOMACH..........
Every single television chef !
Charity Appeals !
Faye Dunnaway's present teeth which I think she must share with Sharon Osborne !
'Celebrities' !
'Experts' !
News reporters standing in the middle of nowhere with nothing going on wittering on about the fact that there's nothing going on !
News reporters especially when they are so-called special correspondents like "Our flood correspondent " etc.
Old people !
Old people with walking sticks or Zimmer frames !
Old people who walk slowly and get in my way !
Old people who choke on their food in restaurants when they're sitting anywhere near me !
Old people who go to old people's special cinema shows and keep asking their partners what the actors say !
Old men who wear cut-offs !
Electric Wheelchair Drivers !
Electric Wheelchair Drivers in Supermarkets even more !
Able-Bodied Motability car drivers and especially the ones who park on double yellows with a car full of family who all get out and go for a leisurely shop with their bellies resting on their supermarket trolley handles !
Slightly skewiffed Motability drivers who are perfectly capable of living a normal life but have decided to milk the system ! They mostly park in a disabled bay, get out, put an unused walking stick over their forearms and march off lighting a cigarette before adopting a slight limp once they've remembered the DSS might be watching !
Vacuum cleaner's flex !
In fact, any flex !
Stephen Fry, Jimmy Carr, their hideous cronies and the audiences who laugh at them !
All Chat Show hosts !
Kirsty Allsop !
Gary Barlow !
Louis Walsh and ALL other plastically enhanced sad old idiots !
Adverts !
The Paralympic Games which I can't watch without making dribbling noises and laughing my head off !
Classic FM !
Every DJ on every other Radio Station !
ALL morning television presenters except Naga Minchetti !
My brothers !
My car which is really very good but looks like a Motability one !
You've Been Framed !
My legs ! Actually I don't think that they are THAT bad ! but I've been made to feel that they are horrible and so I won't wear shorts or cut-offs in public !
Men who wear shorts or cut-offs in public !
Men over nineteen with hair styles and 'fashionable' clothes !
Fat women in high heels and short skirts !
Botoxed women !
Shaven Havens !
Twerking !
That'll do to start with !
No comments:
Post a Comment