Sally-Part 93. I WAS A TRULY TERRIBLE FATHER TO MY DAUGHTER !

THIS IS THE ACTUAL LETTER I WROTE TWENTY ONE YEARS AGO AND STILL WAITING AMONGST MY PAPERS FOR THE RIGHT TIME FOR A YOUNG LADY TO OPEN IT !

I loved each new baby that Shirley produced seemingly from nowhere as I wasn't at any birth !

I think that I am Gemma and Julian's dad but Jonathan's ? Nah !

I not only wasn't at any birth but no man attended their children's births thirty odd years ago. It just wasn't a man's place !

Childbirth was and is woman's work, not that you'd think so if you watch 'One Born Every Minute' where a succession of revoltingly fat and ugly women from the lower classes produce yet more sprogs whilst swearing appallingly at their drug-addict 'partners' who sit gormlessly and hopelessly useless whilst texting or eating !

The nurses all sit around talking about their 'Ugg' boots and women's stuff and eating before resentfully breaking the routine by actually peering round a door at a woman in agony !

Not being at their births didn't make me less of a man nor did it make me more or less capable of guiding them through life.

Well that was until Gemma hit 14 !

This following tale really happened verbatim !

GEMMA MEMORISING EVERY SONG FROM 'OKLAHOMA' AND 'JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR' BEFORE MOVING ON TO THE SCRIPTS OF ALL FOUR SERIES OF 'BLACKADDER' !

As I worked from home the children could come into my room and talk and play shops anytime they wanted. We'd talk about things or rather they'd ignore my little gems.

THIS, NOW FADED PICTURE WAS ENTITLED 'MY HERO' AND WAS PRESENTED TO ME SOME WHILE BEFORE GEMMA'S FOURTEENTH BIRTHDAY !

One day Gemma came in and said, "Dad! Mum says I should ask you if it's OK to go to a sleepover on Saturday."

"Ask me? " I wondered ! I smelled a rat ! No one asked my permission for anything ! Their mother was and still is THE BOSS !

" Oh yeah and who's going Gemma ? " I asked suspiciously !

"Six fourteen year old girls and six sixteen year old boys." she replied in total innocence !

"Really? Well if you let me have the parent's phone number I'll ring and see what the sleeping arrangements are going to be. " I said, not a little concerned.
 
" The parents will be in London for the weekend. " my baby girl said innocently !

" Then you, young lady are not going to that sleepover under any circumstances !"

" Oh Dad!" she stomped and stropped, " You are SO old fashioned ! What do you think we're going to be doing....sex? They've all got girlfriends who keep them sexually satisfied ! "

She then stormed tearfully off back to the lounge shouting, " Maam !" ( That's Geordie for Mum ! )

This sealed letter is now waiting for Gemma's fourteen year old daughter to read when SHE has a strop !

Trouble is Gemma only has two sons and a vasectomied husband so perhaps she could pass it on to one of her friend's daughters at the appropriate time !