Sally-Part 64 ! WALTER WILLIAMS ! THE MOST DECENT AND HONEST MAN IN THE WORLD!

It's time to reveal the most decent and honest man in the world ! His name is Walter Williams and he lives on the Island of Colonsay in a cottage overlooking the stuuning Kiloran Bay.

THE IRREPLACEABLE WALTER WILLIAMS, THE MOST HONEST MAN IN THE WORLD !  ALTHOUGH THERE 'S A SIGN OUTSIDE HIS COTTAGE THAT SAYS 'DOGS WILL BE SHOT !' AND HE LOOKS LIKE HE MEANS IT, HE'S A REAL SOFTY REALLY AND INTERESTED AND KIND TO EVERYONE!

My son Jonathan had just given me a golf ball which flashed on and off for thirty seconds after you hit it so that you could trace it's trajectory and see where it landed and be able to walk towards it and was a brilliant way of being able to carry on playing after dark even though you can't actually see the ball before you hit it making the whole thing pointless in the first place !

I teed off, watched it land and started walking towards it but lost sight of it when it stopped flashing earlier than I thought it would!

I NEVER saw it again even though three of us searched for an hour or more!

The next day Walter, a local who ate all our biscuits and moaned about our restricted selection when we rented a house next door to him, stopped me and ecstatically showed me his latest find....MY lost golf ball !

"Walter where did you find that? It's mine and I lost it on the fifth last night!"

" Aw ! I foond it on the seventh this morning so it canna be yuurs ! " he said clasping it firmer than necessary before heading off to his barn to add it to his collection of hundreds of 'Found' balls !

" Walter ! My son only gave it to me yesterday and it's the only 'AURORA' on the Island and if you let me have it back I will present you with a trophy for your honesty and show you what it does ! " I wheedled.

" Wit it does ? Wit does it dee ? Ahll give it yee afore yee borst intee tearrs but shore me the noo orile kipit! "
I grabbed it, banged it on the floor and watched the pain of loss strike through his eyes as it burst into life and he realised that he'd been robbed of a wonder of the world ! And then I ran out his barn cackling in triumph as he yelled after me; "Sassenach ! Wait 'til ah git ma harnds on yee !"

ALL HAPPY AGAIN ! WALTER PROUDLY ACCEPTING THE TROPHY FOR " THE MOST DECENT AND HONEST MAN ON COLONSAY " FEATURING A MOUNTED ' ST.ANDREW'S ' GOLF BALL ! NOTE THE SOLAR POWERED BAT-DETECTOR THAT I ALWAYS WEAR ON MY HEAD AND WHICH I DEVELOPED FOR WEARING ESPECIALLY  ON COLONSAY AFTER THE INFAMOUS BAT ATTACK THAT I WROTE ABOUT IN PART 29 " NAKED HERO ! "

 I left it for a couple of days and hid from the man and his gun before making and presenting him with this magnificent trophy which cheered him up no end !

There is one other man on Colonsay who deserves praise and that's Keith Rutherford, the Island's endlessly cheerful and helpful Postman whose grin and wave and salute as he drives about on his rounds are those things that make childhood holiday memories so magical ! Oh ! But I'm not a child ! Ah well !

There's lots more 'Colonsay' in Parts 22-29-33-60 and 64.